Friday, February 22, 2008

Schmeye Ar Ess

SCENARIO: You receive a letter from the IRS stating that you owe them $11,457.99 (what?!) because they're just now examining your 2006 taxes, and, well, that's how much you owe them. You are completely fine with the .99 part, but it's the 11,457 part that's kind of hard to swallow. Do you:

a) Cry
b) Try to call your husband
c) Call your dad, sobbing all the while
d) Go talk to your father-in-law, saying, "I need an attorney," crying all the while
e) Pray
f) Think about what a smart move it was on your part to keep important paperwork such as past years' taxes with you and not in storage
g) Immediately blame Turbotax, and plan how to make them responsible
h) Write a check for $11,457.99
i) Look at the paperwork carefully and determine that the IRS doesn't know what it is talking about
j) Call the IRS and work everything out in a satisfactory and no-money-actually-due fashion
k) Breathe a huge sigh of relief, and turn the focus of your crying to the 138 motor oil stains your son just made on the tan carpet
l) All of the above
m) All of the above except (h)

**Addendum per reader suggestion**
n) Freak out
o) Curl up in a fetal position and wait until someone comes home and finds you there
p) Poop your pants, straight up

Yeah, me too. It's also good, if this happens, to have a sister to call who is happy to drop everything and pick up your son from preschool, so you can focus all your attention on the crying and the calling. (Thanks, Ab.)

17 comments:

Claire said...

I and J get my votes. Just call them, they'll work with you and have been known to screw up in the past! At least you'll still get that economic stimulus refund this summer!

AzĂșcar said...

This is like the time I got an electric bill for $29,879. Only your experience is scarier, because, you know, it’s the IRS.

Andrew said...

I can loan you the .99 but I may need it back soon.

Courtney said...

I'm glad you worked it out. I do not think I would get past the freak out stage.

Sarah said...

What in the world? Maybe it's a scam. Some people might just write out the check to Joe Schmoe c/o the IRS and not think twice. I'm sure at least one person fell for it.

Anonymous said...

I'm impressed that you could have covered the check.
AG

Anonymous said...

Did the Spot Shot work on the carpet? AG

Abby said...

It was fun picking up Isaac. I'm glad you're so organized and money-wise and everything got cleared up. We were thinking the same thing as Sarah- some people would just be like, "That stinks," and then write out the check. I bet those suckers don't listen to Dave Ramsey, though.

Emily said...

Abby, I know!! The letter wzas very intimidating and I bet you that some people freak out and write a check when they get it. Nowhere on the letter does it indicate that I just need to submit some receipts to verify my deductions. Completely irresponsible of the IRS.

Carina, Steve and I got a big kick out of your electric bill. That could only happen to you!

Andrew, nice to know you got my back. Can I get that loan in Chinese currency?

AG, we used hand grease remover, then a steam cleaner, and it came out for the most part.

Sarah said...

so what was your stain issue?

Andrew & Heidi Dixon said...

Thanks Emily - I looked up the recipe on Food Network and found it - sounds so good and we both love lobster. Did you use shrimp instead?

Andelin said...

Oh my goodness! How stressful! Is it selfish to say that I'm glad it was you and not me, because I'd probably be calling you crying asking you what YOU (and Dave Ramsey) would do. This way, it skipped a step. Sorry. I know so selfish. Glad it worked out though.

Suzie Petunia said...

Where is the option where you curl up on the floor in the fetal position and stay there until someone comes home and discovers you? 'cause I'm pretty sure that is what I would do. I'm so glad you are stronger than that! I hope everything works out!

Kalli Ko said...

i would have pooped my pants, straight up.

Nancy said...

Oh man, that sucks. I'm so sorry. Just ignore it and see what happens?

Jord said...

That is crazy Emily! I would be totally stressing out, but like you, I'd refuse to write out the check until I knew for sure what was going on. I guess that's all the more reason to have a substantial emergency fund.

Austin said...

I need to do like my brother and marry a girl who manages money well, because I'm pretty sure I would have just freaked and avoid the federal government for the rest of my life.