Thursday, March 23, 2006
So I'm pregnant, and yeah, I've gained some weight, but I don't yet have an obviously pregnant protruding abdomen. At least I don't think I should look obviously pregnant to someone who doesn't know already. Personally, when I run into someone I know who may have put on a few pounds, I have a strict policy to not ask the potentially awkwafying Question unless she's wearing maternity clothes, just to be safe. So I'm always a little taken aback and mildly offended when someone blurts out, "Are you pregnant?!" I grimace. "I am, but I'm only 14 weeks. Can you tell?" Because, frankly, I think that person is walking in dangerous territory, and I want him to know that I think it was a risky question, because I don't think I look pregnant enough for that to be an okay conversation starter.
This conversation played out yesterday with a neighbor/teacher at Elliot's school. It was textbook.
"Emily, are you pregnant?"
"I am, but I'm only 14 weeks. Can you tell?"
"Really?? I know I've gained some weight, but I didn't think I was showing that much yet."
"I'm just kidding. Somebody told me."
Ah, she pulled the quick escape, just kidding routine. Then the all-too-familiar, "Are you hoping for a girl?"
But I was too distracted to respond. I was remembering that time when I was pregnant and working at BYU Mail Services. It was in the first trimester of my first pregnancy (read: I was not showing yet!). I went into the copy room to make some copies and stood patiently while someone ahead of me finished with the machine. A Chinese girl whom I did not know came into the room and stood behind me.
"You waiting?" she asked, and I smiled, gestured to the papers in my hand and nodded. Yes, I was waiting to make some copies on the copy machine.
But that's not what she had meant. "You waiting for baby?"
An internal grimace. A weak smile and nod. An abandonment of the denial I was holding onto that I still looked svelte. Good times. Xie xie.